October it is ADHD month here in Someone to talk to. Because of that you can read about ADHD here and even more on our social media.
There is a lot of research, conversation, theories, beliefs and myths around ADHD… But that’s not what we’re talking about today.
ADHD affects many people and has been doing so for a long time. Did you know that many admired inventors and innovators, of both genders, past and present, are suspected or known to have had or have this disorder? ADHD also has positive sides, which include, among others, enormous creativity, innovative thinking, high motivation, the ability to hyper focus, high vitality…
Despite the above positive aspects, living or working with a disordered person can be quite a challenge. If a person has been diagnosed professionally (or actually by themselves), there is a high probability that they will work on themselves to make them better and others around them to live smoother with them.
What can such people do for themselves? I’ll just give you a few examples and leave it to you to find more of them.
Psychotherapy, or a therapy in general, may be a good start. This is how you can start your journey to your improved world. Therapy can help you understand yourself and your experiences. It can help you become aware of what the issues are that you may be a part of.
In therapy, or on your own, you can educate yourself about ADHD and its impact on important people in your life. Perhaps it will open both your and their eyes and all of you will start offering each other more effective support.
It’s a good idea to look for other people with similar behaviours or quirks. You can learn a lot from support groups and benefit greatly from this type of help. You are not alone – there are many people like you.
Questioning and testing your thoughts and beliefs brings very good results. You don’t have to believe everything you think because thoughts are thoughts, not facts. We usually think in a habitual way, but this is good news. Habits can be overwritten and thus change what is happening to you and around you.
Since your, and every other person’s, brain is plastic, you can train your concentration, mindfulness, ability to focus, improve your ability to hear what is really being said or improve your memory. Thanks to this, you will be much more conscious of making decisions, setting boundaries, you can be more effective at work and you can be more consciously present for people important to you.
Budget is another area of life where many people with ADHD struggle, and this can shadow interpersonal relationships. There is a saying: “If you don’t know what it’s about, it’s usually about finances.” The advice here is to, with your intention in mind, determine your exact income and even more precise expenses. It’s true that you have to spend time on it, but you will gain clarity about your expenses and where you may have “leaks”. You can still work on getting rid of spending impulses, also online.
I cannot fail to mention effective communication here and how important it is. Active listening, not interrupting, asking questions, not showing impatience and other things can be practiced. Every relationship you have will benefit if you can communicate effectively.
If you add skilful time management to the mix, i.e. meeting deadlines, not being late for meetings or doing one thing at a time – you will be much more relaxed and so will the people around you.
In this article, I wrote about several ways to improve the relationship for a person who has ADHD. But actually, people without this disorder would benefit from taking these things to heart too, right?
I wish that to you and to myself 😀
